July - Adoption Reading List

So I (Amy) have spent July perusing our local library for adoption books and stories about Ethiopia.

I had heard the story There Is No Me Without You by Melissa Fay Greene mentioned several times on my Yahoo Group (we are all from the same international adoption agency, America World, and are all adopting from Ethiopia). To say the book was amazing is an understatement. It is the beautiful and heartbreaking story of an Ethiopia woman, Haregewoin Teferra, living in the capital city of Addis Ababa, who after losing both her husband and one grown daughter, is asked to take in a teenage girl and then a teenage boy and then two young girls. She then feels her life has purpose again. Her home eventually becomes an orphanage to over sixty children before she discovers foreign adoption agencies with families interested in adopting the children and since then more than 400 children have been through her home. In between Haregewoin's story there is Ethiopian history - every time something was said, I thought, wait, let me hear that again! There was also the history and impact of AIDS on the continent of Africa and in Ethiopia. Also included were histories of some of the children in the orphanage as well as some information on their lives after they are adopted. One of the many, many thoughts I had while reading this book is I don't know if it would be better for our children to remember their birth parents of not. I highly recommend this book - it is a must read. To learn more visit: http://www.thereisnomewithoutyou.com/

Another book I just finished is called Becoming a Family: Promoting Healthy Attachments with Your Adopted Child by Lark Eshleman. It obviously talked about attachment, how a child attaches to their parents, how attachment can be disrupted, and strategies to deal with attachment issues. While the book talked mostly about baby adoptions, there are still many things we'll be able to use with older children. And I did get the great idea of purchasing gifts in Ethiopia to give our children over the years! (We knew we'd buy clothes and decorative items for the house, but I'd never thought about ongoing gifts - awesome!). And there was a beautiful adoption story written by a father for his adopted daughter starting from the time her "China Mom and Dad" knew they wouldn't be able to take care of a baby and after watching the sun set, placed her in a spot where she would be found, taken to an orphange, and eventually adopted. The story ends with the Forever Mom and Dad holding the "Beautiful Baby Girl" and watching the sunset. Precious, and I can't wait to write our own and have Mike illustrate it!!

I have just begun another book called Dim Sum, Bagels, and Grits: a Sourcebook for Multicultural Families by Myra Alperson, a single woman who adopted a daughter from China. The book is organized into four parts: We Are Family, Moving Forward, Meeting Challenges, and Resources. I am enjoying it so far and will share what I learn.